Is screen time really that bad for little kids?

Technology and screen time are big issues for this parenting generation, and they’re topics we need to think about earlier and earlier - hence they’re subjects we cover in Toolbox Preschool Years. Because even though our toddlers might not yet be able to read or write, most of them can navigate YouTube on their parents’ phones, operate an iPad and spot Bluey from a mile away.

Recently, during one of the Toolbox sessions I was facilitating, a parent asked the question “Why is screen time so bad?” He and his wife had different perspectives about how harmful screen time actually is and they were trying to figure out what to do. As he pointed out, he was told as a kid that if he watched too much TV he would develop square eyes (that old scare tactic!), yet he had turned out fine. It led to a really interesting discussion within the group and one that I think was important.

Generalisations like ‘screen time is bad’ and ‘all technology needs to be avoided as long as possible’ seem to be all over child-raising. This parent was questioning; he didn’t want to blindly just follow the ‘this is bad, don’t do it’ crowd – he wanted to make an informed decision for his child based on facts and deep consideration. I applaud him for doing that because as we all know, it’s really hard to remain strong against a child who is continually asking for a screen. We spend a lot of time and effort resisting those requests, so I think our decisions should be well-considered.

The World Health Organisation (WHO) recommends no screen time at all for babies under two years old, and no more than one hour of screen time per day for children aged two to four years old. Interestingly, the reason for this seems to be less to do with what our little ones are watching during screen time and more to do with the fact that they’re sedentary while they’re doing it.

Brainwave Trust’s article, ‘Tamariki and Technology’ contains great information about content, language development, behaviour, games and apps. One thing I found useful from this article is that live video chatting apps, such as FaceTime, Skype or Zoom, can be a positive thing in young children’s lives as they ‘have the potential to support the development of relationships between children and whānau’. It seems that active engagement with technology is better for us than passive watching.

Similarly, games can be really social forms of technology use. Today’s kids use online games to connect with their friends. As Tricky Kids author Andrew Fuller writes, video games link into three of the most desired states of childhood:

1. The ability to have adult-like adventures with minimal adult involvement.
2. The ability to test yourself
3. The sense of being in a club of other young people.

As well as brain development, technology use also impacts the eyes and eyesight development. (Click here to read more on this in an article from the Manawatu Guardian.) Optometrists recommend exposing children to more natural light that comes from playing outside. Myopia (short-sightedness) can be developed from staring at screens or from being indoors for extended periods of time. The takeaway here that I found (again, focusing on what we can do rather than what we can’t) is to offer screen time on television or a computer, which tends to be at a further distance away, rather than on a phone or iPad that kids will tend to hold closer to their face. And to intersperse screen time with playtime outside.

What I learnt from WHO, Brainwave Trust and optometrists is that limits are necessary. When I was growing up, limits were externally imposed. My siblings and I had to wait a whole week until it was Saturday morning again and we could watch the ONE episode of our favourite cartoon, and then it was interrupted by ads every seven minutes! Today our kids have a never-ending choice of programming to choose from on streaming platforms, and so do we. The closest thing we come to an external limit is the helpful reminder ‘Are you still watching?’ after we’ve binged four episodes in a row. It’s up to us as parents to decide on how much we are comfortable with in our families, and enforce those limits.

Books! Good old-fashioned reading aloud never goes out of style and has proven benefits for child development. I’m also a big fan of audiobooks. I picked up an old-school CD player from our local market for $10 and my kids love listening to CDs borrowed from the library on it. We also listen to stories through Audible and podcasts. Audiobooks and podcasts are great substitutions for screen time in the car and for before bedtime for kids who take a while to get to sleep.

Music and dancing, games, art, free and imaginative play, outdoor play, sand and water play, messy play... there is an endless list of screen-free activities that are not only entertaining for our preschoolers (and us grown-ups!), but also hugely beneficial to their mental, physical and emotional development.

Screen time releases feel-good hormones. I liken turning off the television when the kids are watching it to taking a coffee away from me when I’m only halfway through – the result is rarely pleasant. Two things that work in my family is giving a five-minute warning before turning-off time, and having an activity ready for afterwards that’s distracting and enjoyable. Usually this involves food or going out somewhere.

Parenting isn’t black and white. There’s no one-size-fits-all and there aren’t a hard and fast set of rules that every family can apply equally. How much access you want to give your children to screen time within your home is worth thinking about. It isn’t all bad, and its part of growing up in today’s world. Listen to your instincts, consider the pros and cons, decide on your family’s values and how technology use fits in to them. Then you can confidently set limits on technology use with your children.